1st card:

Temperance

On this position of your spread Balgobin, you picked the Temperance. And just as its name suggests this card carries a peaceful message for you Balgobin. From the angel to the water, everything about this card is a message of peace here. In fact, the angel represented on The Temperance card is inviting you to be patient. This woman is pouring water from one cup to another, which obviously means that she’s compromising. She tries to mix all the perspectives to get the perfect solution.

For you Balgobin, this means that you had to adapt yourself a lot lately, and you’ll have to keep doing so in the weeks to come, especially with someone in particular. In fact, you’ll have to be patient with this person close to you and show them that you are here to listen. They’re going through a difficult time as well Balgobin, and they also need to know that they can count on you. You have your own desires, and don’t worry you’ll be able to fulfil them, but sometimes you’ll have to put them on a side in order to fully dedicate yourself to this person’s desires as well. These compromises and small gestures every day will greatly strengthen your bond with this person.

I know it’s difficult to stay calm and patient in times like these, but patience always pays, especially in relationships my dear. Because as I said, you’ll be able to fulfil your desires, and this other person will be there to help you just as you were there to help them. So even if it’s hard sometimes, if you have to sacrifice some of your time, some of your goals, it’s only for the best Balgobin: for the fulfillment of someone you care about, and yours as well.

2nd card:

Strength

Balgobin, you picked the Strength in its upright position which is very positive. The card is numbered XI in the arcana and related to your personal characteristics such as self-control, willpower, courage, determination and quiet Strength.

The card shows a young woman, symbol of self-control and willpower, and a lion, which represents buried desires and passions. I’m not surprised you have picked this card my dear, because of these unusual times, staying in control is important especially in order to be able to manage your relationships with the people in your life when you’re forced to be away from some of them. Stressful times put a lot of strain on ourselves and on the way we act and treat other people.

On an affection level, this card means that you should be looking for fulfilling, stable and long-lasting relationships, Balgobin. As you are comfortable with your strengths as well as your weaknesses, you should recognize that other people in your life also have their own weaknesses and strengths.

Moreover, you should never give up looking for the right person who will see the positive side in you and never be scared to show people you care about your true and real self.

Always communicate your thoughts and let people also communicate theirs. It's really important especially during stressful times. When it comes to your relationship with people, whether romantic, family or at work, it’s always important to maintain peace. A simple example, is not having to prove yourself always right especially for trivial things in everyday life. Let things go if it means peace for you and people in your life.

3rd card:

The Hanged Man

The Hanged Man card brings up a lot of questions and fear as to what it represents. However, the card can be very beneficial if you know how to interpret its meaning and that’s why I am here my dear. It represents a man hanged by his right foot, a rope holding his leg to a horizontal stick. The hanged man is surrounded by two reversed trees which symbolizes the impossibility to root, stagnation, but also the ever-ending possibilities open to you Balgobin. The lack of roots means your becoming, your opportunity for change and renewal that you’ve been looking for. You can see the hanged man’s right ear which shows his willing to listen and consider the solutions brought to him. He is calm and looking straight ahead: he has accepted his situation. He can’t move, but he has accepted it and lives in peace.

For you Balgobin, it means a lot of thinking ahead, probably a lot of wait as some of your projects are now pending. You need to accept these obstacles and the delays in your life right now. If it feels that your life has been in limbo for a while, it’s okay Balgobin, because the resolution is near. However, you won’t find a way out if you don’t work on your path, on your future and how you want your future to look like. You need to accept the signs that tell you to hold off for a while and reorganize your life. This is perhaps your biggest challenge so far but don’t worry, my dear, because here the Hanged Man tells you that you will have a positive outcome soon and a complete regeneration ahead!

You need to take in account your past and you present to make the right decisions about your future. You also need to have the maturity and the determination to make important choices in your life. This card is highly beneficial because it shows you open to the world around you and willing to accept help as well as reconsidering bad choices that you’ve made in the past. It shows your generosity, your ability to adapt to frightful and difficult events, your flexibility and your kindness.

4th card:

The Empress

I can clearly see the energy that lead you to pick this card: The Empress is the official power, seen by all and respected for her thoughtfulness by everyone. This Balgobin means that your possessions and your opinion on your self-worth will improve. Also, the Empress is one of the Tarot cards that rule intuition, deeply linked to creativity: you won’t be out of ideas, and you will find your imagination to be boosted in the near future, especially in your professional life, where all these skills will be very useful. However, your imagination shouldn’t make you want to run away from reality my dear: but there are no worries to have, because as I told you, the Empress seeks for harmony and balance, and this is what you will find too Balgobin. Serenity is coming your way Balgobin.

Generally speaking, the Empress is a positive card for you. She will inspire you some confidence and will encourage you to act the right way in your professional life. She invites you to concretize your projects Balgobin, and this card can also be a messenger of changes, you may get the opportunity to change your career goal.

5th card:

The Wheel of Fortune

This card represents the endless cycles of life, the different cycles we will have to go through in life. It can be seen as destiny, a game of chance or the natural cycle of life. The Wheel of Fortune brings news of big changes in your life which will have an impact on all aspects of your life. For your relationships Balgobin, it can mean that you are going to meet someone who will become highly significant in your life or that will slowly become more and more distant from people in your life. In any case, the card reminds you of the important of thinking about these changes, anticipate their consequences and if needed put some distance in order to take a step back. Life has a cyclic nature and better times always come after hardships Balgobin. New opportunities will arise in the future for your career and you need to have the people around you to support you in new cycles of life. For your career it will mean that new paths will appear that might be unexpected! New responsibilities will be expected from you and you will grow toward a new stage of your life. It is a card of movement, evolution and renewal which will be welcomed after a long period of stagnation in your life.

This card is meant to suggest that much abundance is going to come to your life. It shows that you are able to gain a lot of rewards out of your current situation if you just let things happen. As you picked this card, it means that one season of yourself is about to end so that there is more room for a powerful new you to come in! Be careful not to ignore these changes Balgobin! The card also warns you about turning your back to great changes that are inevitable to you. This means that you need to be careful of this outcome otherwise you could be tempted to live entirely in the past, bittersweet and angry instead of productive, happy and hopeful for the future just like you wanted. There might be some times that will be more difficult to open you up for growth but the trick is to allow yourself to have some freedom to let go of what isn’t serving you well. With time you will see clearly what you need Balgobin and don’t need in your life and what you need to let go of so you can truly move forward despite any difficulties you may encounter in this new step in your life! Trust yourself Balgobin and allow yourself some time. It is better to slowly grow than to desperately try to go back in time.

6th card:

Death

I know both the name and the description of the card sound scary at first Balgobin, but let me explain. In this Tarot death doesn’t mean that things will never happen again, that things are to be in the past forever and that you’ll never find the same again. On the contrary, it’s more positive than that: it means that an unfavorable period came to an end and that a change is coming, but only for the best, only to allow you to rebuild something better.

After The Death comes the rebirth my dear. And right now a period of your life came to an end, not by choice, but by necessity. The current circumstances required adaptation and led you to change some things in your entire life: career, relationships, your daily life, everything went through a lot and you couldn’t keep your former life the way it was.

So the life you had before came to an end, but it doesn't mean it will entirely be different Balgobin. Of course some things, some habits, some people will remain in your life. Don’t worry you won’t be completely lost in this new era. But you’ll have to adapt to new things, as you’ve already started to do until now. You needed to rely on new skills to adapt to these new circumstances. And you need to keep going Balgobin, that’s what the card is telling you. The Death is showing you that a period of your life is over, and that now, it is up to you to adapt and build the future you want to build based on fresh and stronger foundations.

So The Death card is telling you to keep going. You can’t go backwards because it will mean go against the change, you need to keep on changing and adapting to this new world. You're on the right tracks my dear. All the efforts you put right now will pay.

7th card:

The Pope

This is the 5th Arcana in the Tarot de Marseille, and as the name of the card suggests, it has a highly spiritual function my dear Balgobin. It’s represented by this elderly and wise man with a long white beard, his allure and position reflect his experience and wisdom. He represents everything that is stable and long lasting and symbolizes 3 mains pillars to achieve real spiritual fulfilment: instinct, consciousness and knowledge.

This card reveals the secrets of the soul and the universe and has important messages to you my dear Balgobin. The first message is full of love and humanity my dear. given the spiritual nature of this card, you are expected to make kindness, mutual trust, communication and emotional tranquility the basis of every relationship in your life. People come and go into your life, time and life can change people enormously. The only stable and constant factor is how you treat them. The simple answer is yes, love and being connected to people is what is going to bring you the happiness and fulfilment you are seeking my dear Balgobin.

The second message is that whatever situation you are trying to improve, whether personal or professional, you will achieve success if you let people help you. You have a lot of potential my dear Balgobin, you are capable, but life sometimes put more challenges than we can take. And it’s ok to ask for help and guidance, this doesn’t mean you can’t do it, it only means that you are exploring all your options and that you are determined to achieve your goals. You will have to trust someone and let this person help at some point because this help will make you believe in altruism. Doing something for someone just to help..it will be spiritually rewarding. You will so good about it that you will feel the need to do more involved in good causes as they bring you the spiritual peace and good karma you seek, Balgobin.

The third and last message is a reminder of how important it is not to stray out of the good path and values you set for yourself. Everything in your life will make more sense if you stick to your principles of honestly, clairvoyance and straightforwardness Balgobin. This is also exactly what you need to fight against the monotony of everyday life and routines. They will push you to reflect on yourself and your life mission…you are on the right path to achieve inner peace my dear Balgobin.

8th card:

The High Priestess

Now Balgobin, for this position of your spread my dear, you picked the Arcana II of the deck: The High Priestess! As you can see on the picture Balgobin, The High Priestess is an old woman sitting with a book on her lap. She’s looking at the horizon, on her left, quiet and thinking. As far as Tarot is concerned, when characters look on their left, they’re looking at their past, while the right represents the future. So here, this old woman seems in deep reflection about her past. This card is a great example of wisdom. Her age, the book on her lap, her calm, everything confirms that this woman is a very wise person trying to find a solution about a past problem. And she will find the solution within herself.

The elements of this card are simple but very important Balgobin. They show that no matter the problem or the past you have, the real solution to overcome it is within yourself. Introspection is the key people often forget when they have to solve an issue or find a way to lift a blockage. If you know your capacities, if you know what you want, the solution is within you, in your heart and in your soul. Only you can solve your problems.

Of course, knowledge about yourself is the most important one Balgobin, but it doesn’t mean that you should leave all the other kind of knowledge aside either. That’s why the woman has a book on her lap: she’s expanding her knowledge. Even at old age, she never stops learning.

“Knowledge is power” Balgobin. The more you know, the more you’re able to solve the problems you faced. You can hear about a similar situation and apply the similar solution, you can know more about some people, some places and act accordingly, or you can develop or rediscover your talents and use it to reach what you want. Knowledge is the basis of everything my dear.

Well Balgobin, now that you have your future unveiled, now that you know what will happen, I propose you an individual coaching whose advice is oriented towards the question you asked me. Read it carefully for this coaching is as important as your draw’s interpretation : it contains guidelines for your general well-being.

1/ LIFE PROJECTS

Balgobin, whatever your life plans are, they are essential for your personal fulfillment. They define your reason for living, they stimulate you and are the reason why you wake up every day. Whether you purchase a short-term or a long-term project, a personnal or a professional project, or you decide to change drastically your life, all the advice that I will give you will help you adopt the right mindset to succeed. No matter how long it will take Balgobin, the essence of each project is in the road you will cross, for the beauty of a trip lies is its preparation. We will try to guide you together throughout your projects.

Start your own family, move to another country, completely change your professional path… several projects can scare you Balgobin. Indeed, you may have to take a big jump on the unknown, and there is nothing more scaring, I understand. When you know what scares you, at least you know what consequences can occur. Besides, when something unknown scares you, you don’t know what consequences can occur, and this is where there are two types of people Balgobin :

• There are people who are bold and curious enough to make a big jump into the void : these persons take risks but multiply their efforts to purchase their ultimate goal
• Besides, there are persons that don’t dare to undertake anything, they prefer to stay in their comfort zone not to take any risk. Generally, these persons experience frustration and melancholy as they grow up.

You understood Balgobin, the greatest danger is your comfort zone. I will help you become this new person : someone who dare to jump into the void in order to purchase happiness !

Taming the fear of change

The comfort zone is the zone that includes everything you consider as habits and rituals. It allows you to feel secure ans safe, because in this zone, you know what will happen. It is necessary for your development as a human-being and for your balance. Imagine a world where each day, when you wake up, everything change in your house. All parts have changed and nothing is in the same place anymore. Can you handle it with such a level of uncertainty ? Without any landmark ?

The convenient side of this zone comes from the fact that you know in advance the result that you get. This is a feeling of security. But that doesn’t mean that what you experience is pleasant at all. Sometimes it is just the opposite ! For example, it is possible that you are in a professional or personal situation in which you have no doubt : you know how to react in regards to every situation. You are not stressed because there is no new or unknown situation. But that doesn’t mean that you are fulfilled in your job or in your personal situation !

The risk appears if you operate only in this zone. As everything is known and a few new things come to shake you, you live less and less stimulating events. Then, you get into the habit of staying in what you know and you don’t visit the novelty anymore. If you stay in this zone for too much time Balgobin, you will get a feeling of anxiety and suffocation. It may already be the case ! It’s as if you wear a T-shirt that fits you, but the more time passes, the more the T-shirt gets shorter ! No matter how comfortable your path is, at some point you will want to experience something else !

The discomfort zone or learning zone

The discomfort zone is uncomfortable because all that occurs is not known. The result is neither predictable nor controllable. This zone is also called ‘learning zone’ for it is by testing new things, despite discomfort, that you will progressively learn what you like, but also what you dislike. To know if the experience will be a triumph or a defeat, you are therefore obliged to take the risk of trying Balgobin. When you will visit this zone, you will discover more about yourself, others and the world around you. You know, Balgobin, we explore the world since we’re toddlers : as soon as we can walk we want to expand our environment. As adults, we are not totally different !

Expand your comfort zone through your discomfort zone

In addition to allowing you to evolve, regularly visiting your discomfort zone will also allow you to gradually expand your comfort zone. If you want to stop feeling cramped it is necessary to visit your discomfort zone regularly and do it little by little to get used to being in contact with discomfort. Don’t aim for too much change at once so as not to make the experience too abrupt and intense. Once it is a habit, it means that the experience is part of your comfort zone.

The insecure zone : time to learn

The insecure zone is everything that lies beyond the discomfort zone. What you will feel when you come into contact with this area is a fear, even a feeling of panic. For example, your boss fires you while you didn’t expect that. And sometimes there are situations where coming back to your comfort zone is not possible. The remaining option is to explore this new situation, looking for new habits, new points of reference, new rituals that will allow you to reassure yourself, to feel safe and to gradually find a more comfortable life. Recreating a comfort zone can be done by trying to find or create situations and routines that will give you less stress and more well-being !

You have to trust your little voice which, despite your fears, tells you : « I’m on it ! », « now is the time to go ! ». Balgobin, you also have to be patient, because this feeling of fear or discomfort will not disappear by itself : you have to stay in the presence of this discomfort until your anxiety subsides. And trust me, it will !

Get rid of your fears !

Now, how to do it factually ? here are a series of exercises that will help you deal with your fear of the unknown Balgobin.

1/ Think hard in your head about the difference between fear of the unknown and fear of danger. It is often the confusion of both that makes you back away from the unknown, whereas the two are quite distinct ! Suddenly leaving your job or life partner = fear of the unknown. Finding yourself in a life-threatening situation = fear of danger. In one case, perhaps a great happiness can appear later. In the other case, only a miracle could fix the situation. Now, Balgobin, getting out of your comfort zone means meeting the unknown, not the fear of danger !

2/ Bit by bit, confront the fear of the unknown with small examples to start. This will boost your self-confidence for you will see how capable you are going for uncomfortable things !

• Do something different from your usual routine whenever you can. You can start by changing your decor, going to places you don’t know, doing something on your own that you are used to do with others, etc.
• Challenge yourself in ways that are both exciting and scary. For example, dare to intervene in your work on something you did not understand or on the contrary, to take an initiative that you are not used to.
• Remember that the feeling of fear of the unknown doesn’t last. For example, if you’re invited to a party but you don’t know anyone or almost no one, you’ll see that you’ll get used to it and that little by little you’ll get into the discussions : your feelings at the end of the evening will not be the same as at the beginning !
• Take life as a big laboratory Balgobin. You will experiment and if some things don’t work out the way you want, that’s okay. Take things lightly, it’s all about experiencing and learning !
• Surround yourself with successful, risk-taking people who like to explore different options. These people will serve as role models and show you that anything is possible, you are your own limit Balgobin.
• Once you are comfortable with these different exercises, you can set a goal that is both exciting and challenging to get out of your comfort zone. You can do it alone or with others.

« Living is the rarest thing in the world, most are content to exist »

- Oscar Wilde.

2/ PERSONAL FULFILLMENT

The four agreements

Don Miguel Ruiz wrote « The Four Agreements » . In this very well-known book, the shamanic teacher and healer exposes beliefs and presents an effective code of personal conduct learned from his Toltec ancestors. These agreements contain seeds to transform your life, Balgobin. I will share these ideas with you and explain it to you as simply as I can :

Be impeccable with your word

In fact, words have power ! The word is a tool that can create, or destroy. Words clearly have a weight : they act on your reality. I am sure you have in memory a word, a sentence, that had a big positive or negative effect on you. And perhaps you will remember this for the rest of your life.

Ok then, how to put it in practice ?

You have to find a balance. You have to talk with moderation. So never talk too much, too quickly. And it starts with the speech you have towards yourself, Balgobin. Be kind with yourself. Sentence like « I’m bad », « I won’t succeed » can’t be part of your vocabulary. And you know why ? Because you project what you think ! So try to replace these sentence by « I can’t do it now, but I’ll do my best! », or « I don’t have the talent to do it, because my talent lies elsewhere! »

Don’t take anything personally

What people do and say is only a projection of their own reality. If you don’t take things personally, you are no longer a victim of unnecessary suffering. What people think about you IS NOT YOU. It is what they THINK you are. It gives you the possibility to step back. You are not responsible for other’s actions, Balgobin.

Don’t make assumptions

Instead of making assumptions, try to ask more questions, to express your desires. Communicate clearly with people, in order to avoid sorrow and disapointment. Indeed, you probably make a lot of assumptions mechanically, and you make conclusions by yourself, about people, about something you saw, and so on. And sometimes, you believe in. For example : if a friend didn’t tell you ‘hello’ this morning, after seeing you, you will make some assumptions about the reason why. This is an unnecessary suffering.

To avoid this kind of situation, Balgobin, try to express your doubts, try to initiate a discussion. Don’t keep your fears in your head. Because if you make an assumption, then you will believe in it, you will ACT regarding your beliefs, and it can become a source of anxiety or stress.

For example, if a friend didn’t tell you ‘Hello’ this morning, try to analyze the different reasons instead of thinking that he doesn’t love you enough. Don’t be mad at him. It’s possible he’s tired, or that he is not well morally and that he did not have adequate clarity of mind. So wait a little bit and then go express your doubts and your feelings.

Always do your best

To always do your best, you have to considerate what is YOUR best. Your best, Balgobin, is unique. I mean, it is not the « BEST » of anyone else, you can’t campare yourself with somebody else. You have your own skills and abilities. You have your own intelligence and your talents. So we all different, and we all do great things, but each differently. It’s all about balance : you have to kind a perfect balance between making less (it can gives you frustration) or making always more (you loose your energy and you don’t have a good self-esteem).

How to put it in practice ? First of all, define what is YOUR best, day by day. Your energy today will not be the same tomorrow : so maybe your best for today is just to read some pages of a book. But, maybe tomorrow it will be to create a huge project in your job. In any case, Balgobin, doing your best has nothing to do with perfection. And it is probably a mistake you make : you want to be perfect, you want to do more and more, but you have your own possibilities, so try to delimitate boundaries. For example, try to replace « I have to do this » with « I can do this ». The difference is small but very important : you must take ownership of the goal, without worrying about the judgment of others.

3/ CAREER PATH

Which direction do you choose for your year 2023 ?

Balgobin, it is essential that you set a new trajectory for 2023. I’m going to expose you 4 professional situations, and in regards to the one you’re currently in, I give you some guidelines :

• WAITING : you don’t dare to undertake Balgobin. Whereas you are aware of your skills and abilities. You have proven yourself and met your goals and more, but you tend to wait for things to happen on their own. The fact is that you have a lack of confidence in you Balgobin. But you deserve to be under the spotlight ! You should ask for other tasks, you should dare to take initiatives and why don’t you ask for a promotion or a salary increase ?
• SAY STOP : You’re exhausted, you can’t take it anymore, you don’t like your job anymore, you can’t think and know what you want. Your efforts have been enormous or you’ve been working too hard these past months. Balgobin, the most important right now, is to get some rest, to take time away to reflect on your current situation. Of course you have to take a decision for your mental health matters more than anything else, but you have to breathe before so that you won’t regret your decision. Then, Balgobin, you will know what to do. What if you take a year off ? What if you ask for part-time work ? What if you take the opportunity to get interested in a formation program that would allow you to evolve professionaly ? What if you finally quit your job to find a better one ?
• STIMULATION : You are very efficient in your job Balgobin. You are full of new ideas and you’re very eclectic, so you need to try out different things. Perhaps that you even ilmagine to create your own business or you have ideas of freelancing. In that case, Balgobin, it is clear that you have a great need to be stimulated. You can’t fall back into repetitive tasks that don’t highlight your will and your skills. You have to think throughout this question : « what do I have to lose ? ». One thing is sure Balgobin, it is clear that you have a great need to be stimulated.
• CONTROL : You take things in hand in 2023 ! You become your own boss, you reorient yourself in another professional area, you quit your job… It’s a good thing ! You’re foolhardy Balgobin, and it’s a great skill.

Whatever your current situation, you have to develop some strategies to take the right direction Balgobin. That’s why I’ve developed some advice for you. Read it carefully and try to apply them as much as you can !

• Take care of your mental health ! The number of hours you work should be something you are careful about. Rethink the way you organize your daily routine if you need it, consider teleworking if you can, because work is becoming more and more nomadic. But above all, it is important that you understand that everyone has their own tolerance level, so set up yours Balgobin, set limits even if your limits are not the limits of others.
• Depending on the job you have, it is essential that you release the accumulated pressure with a physical activity Balgobin. Whether you join a sport club or you do a home workout that can only take 10 or 15 minutes, take this time to relax your mind and stimulate your body ! This activity will allow you to relieve yourself of all the mental burden that you accumulate throughout the day.
• Carry out a personalized skills assessment according to your approach (change of post, reorientation, promotion…). This assessment allow you to get a clear vision of all your knowledge (technical skills, language…). This is something you can give to apply for a job that is in the same vein or a more important job. Your professional desires must become realities !
• Today, human-being is at the heart of strategies. It is important to have a good group cohesion Balgobin. So don’t hesitate to initiate events and tasks that will reinforce this cohesion. This behavior based on benevoilence and positive communication will not only increase the good mood at work, but will also be able to create a climate of trust that will reinforce productivity and support !
• Finally, Balgobin, keep learning ! Several studies have shown that 80% of the jobs don’t exist yet. This proves that our societyis evolving very fast and that new means must be put in place so that you can reorient yourself or adapt to this future professional life. The fact is that there are no many ways to get training other than going back to school or university for several years : e-learning, mobile-learning, distance learning… You must seize this opportunity to evoluate as long as you grow up, get out of your comfort zone ! You will see that this new stimulation contributes to your personal fulfillment and happiness Balgobin.

4/ YOUR EMOTIONS

Balgobin, there are times when a couple goes wrong, when conflicts break out, even though love is strong. Conflicts sometimes make us have disproportionate reactions, either because they make us so angry, or because they sadden us to a point where we can't see a way out. I will teach you to understand these emotions, because there is no handling without understanding first, so that your emotions are no longer a factor of conflict in your relationship (this can also work with friendship of course!)

The notions of hyperemotivity and hypersensitivity have been widely exploited in the psychological literature in recent years, and are among the top sellers in the ‘personal development’ section.

While some people keep control of their emotions, others overreact to a situation or event. We are not all equal when it comes to our emotions!

Why is this article for you? Balgobin, no matter how sensitive you are on a daily basis, there are bound to be moments in your life that you experience more intensely than others, or that you feel you experience disproportionaly. Have you ever felt different from others because of your strong emotions? Have you ever thought that you feel things strangely more strongly than others?

So I’m going to talk about hyperemotivity: I’m going to show you the characteristics of each concept as well as their strong points, and I’m going to help you understand these concepts. Balgobin, the more you understand how you work, the better you will know yourself, the more you will know how to act in the situations you will face and the more better you will know how to avoid delicate situations.

Living with intense emotions is difficult and tiring, but it is a real gift.

Hyperemotionality is the propensity of a person to feel shaken by an event that seems unimportant. A change of schedule, the loss of an object, a movie, can be enough to trigger a heightened anxiety, a very strong feeling of insecurity, which can be well hidden behind a rigidity on the surface. It is a violent emotional upheaval that can happen even for a very small detail and that is impossible to control. Balgobin, have you ever felt different from others in that you felt your emotions were overflowing? Have you ever felt helpless in a situation? A situation that prevented you from thinking because the emotions were too strong? This is the first step Balgobin! If you can identify the moments when events overwhelm you: you are on the right step! If you can identify situations that you can't control, that's a great start!

The first thing Balgobin, is to realize that this hyperemotivity is problematic. If you do nothing, it will be painful and you will suffer from it. On the contrary, if you become aware of this problem, you will be able to enjoy it and see some advantages. At the same time, you must understand that hyperemotivity is not always negative! It is an alert that invites you to better take into account your reactions and needs. So be aware of this balance that must be found:

• Yes, I detect that there is a problem
• I don’t take this awareness as a fatal blow

As a first step Balgobin, before continuing, I would like you to note (or think in your head) about all the characteristics of your emotionality: what are the reactions you have when an event overwhelms you? How do these emotions handicap you? What is it that makes you suffer behind these characteristics? Is it the difference? Not feeling understood? Think about this carefully before proceeding.

How do you know if you are hyperemotional?

Hyperemotivity is usually detected in youth, but it can also appear following an emotional shock.

Here are some symptoms and triggers that chartacterize someone who is hyperemotional:

• Difficulties in managing your emotions: in everyday life, there is a tendency to react disproportionately to certain events. For example, when given a reprimand at work, most people will get offended but move on very quickly. A person who is hyperemotional or hypersensitive will certainly have their day ruined as they will take it very hard and suffer.
• Relational difficulties: do you usually cancel a date or a party? Sometimes even at the last minute? Do you have trouble communicating, making yourself understood, making friends? Hyperemotional or hypersensitive peole often have difficulties in relationships because they feel too different, because they appreciate solitude or because they have a very high level of anxiety which prevents them from being in the serenity of a friendship.
• Fear of being abandoned: it is possible that you are afraid of being abandoned sometimes Balgobin, that you start imagining scenarios that don’t happen or that you ‘test’ the loyalty of the people around you, sometimes pushing the arguments veyr far to see if the person will stay or not.
• Irritability or sudden mood swings: since a situation takes on a colossal dimension when there is no need for it, only a few seconds can separate a calm and serene state from an outbreak of anger, sadness or anxiety.
• Characteristics such as anxiety, shyness, being introverted or extraoverted
• Empathy is generally much higher than average because there is a facility to put yourself in another’s position and a facility to understand human emotions.
• You’re very sensitive to injustices, to great causes such as feminism, the animal cause, ecology, etc.

Example: you get a complaint from your boss (the example also works with a friend). The average person, when confronted with such a situation, will feel bad for a while and move on. An hyperemotional person, however, will feel really bad. They may have extreme reactions such as anger or sadness, and may not be able to work for the rest of the day. This emotional upset can cause you to overreact.

If you have been able to identify yourself through these lines Balgobin, it is now very important not to feel guilty, not to feel ‘sick’ either, because it is FAR from being a disease, it is only a temperament, a personality feature.

Balgobin, I have a great news: your emotions can give you so much if and only if you learn you own limits and if you know how to control them. If you consider yourself to be a hyperemotional person, if you understand what it is and are aware of the moments when it affects you: you already have important elements in hand!

Balgobin, here are some keys that will allow you to:

• Cultivate positivity
• Minimize negative emotions
• Control your emotions and find balance
• AND ESPECIALLY to love and accept yourself as you are

Are you ready Balgobin? Let’s start !

Emotional intelligence is a kind of intelligence extremely important. It is the ability to understand and become aware of your own emotions in order to better manage them. It also involves taking into account the emotions of others in your relationships. Balgobin, a good level of emotional intelligence is completely linked to your personal success in that the ability to control your emotions and take into account the emotions of others is important in relationships AS MUCH AS it is the ability to pursue a long-term goal. And the good news is that this form of intelligence can be developed! However Balgobin, the fundamental component of emotional intelligence that you may have difficulty with is managing and controlling your emotions. But pay attention, controlling emotions does not mean that you have to hide them, reject them or not assume them, on the contrary! This is where many people go wrong, but I am sure that you, Balgobin, will not make this mistake.

That means that you have to learn how to:

• Tolerate and accept your emotions, even if they are difficult, you must not judge them!
• Minimalize the source of your negative emotions that increase their frequency and intensity. To do this, you must cultivate positivity Balgobin
• Consider the negative impact that expressing your own emotions has on others (especially if your emotions are explosive like anger)

To stay motivated Balgobin, a great tip is to record your progress in a journal or notebook. This will allow you to keep track of what you are doing, and especially to see the improvements that will take place. Don’t hesitate to write it down examples of what you are experiencing.

Balgobin, here is a strategy to learn how to regulate your emotions:

• First step: ‘WHAT’

Learn as much as you can about your emotions, and become more aware of how you feel. An excellent way to do this is to remember one or more recent emotional situations and remember how you reacted. This will help you to be more 'rationally' sensitive to your emotions when you will experience them.

• Second step: ‘WHY’

Try to determine why you reacted the way you did based on these situations. Balgobin, sometimes the reason for the intense emotions is not what you think it is. Sometimes it is much deeper! Let me give you a concrete example:

You are so afraid of abandonment that when your partner is away spending time with friends, you get angry, impulsive, and can create an intense argument. At first sight: this will look like a feeling of jealousy, when in fact it is a powerful feeling of insecurity that goes back to a past emotional trauma or shock that has created a great fear of abandonment.

Besides, at the family level, your own fears and apprehensions that you had as a child with your own parents, can be reflected in your behavior with your children, as a repetition of a pattern.

Obviously, these are just examples so that you understand the importance of understanding the reason for intense emotions.

And do you know what will make you a good person, a better person, an emotionally intelligent person and someone people will want to lean on?? This is the difference between the majority of people, who judge easily, and YOU, who will reason by empathy, who will always try to understand WHY people around you react in such or such a way in order to understand them better and help them. And you will succeed in having this wonderful quality by trying it on YOU FIRST! Understand yourself to better understand others Balgobin: that is my own purpose!

It is possible that some shocks of the past have left indelible traces that are responsible for your intense emotions. It is not a question of erasing the past Balgobin, you and I know that it is impossible, it is rather a question of understanding it and avoiding that it does not overwhelm you all your life. Write down all this information; maybe some of the causes are similar: then you will point to a recurring problem from your past and you will know what to work on! This problem is a real trigger, you have to identify it.

• Third step: ‘THE ALTERNATIVES’

Balgobin, imagine experiencing one of these emotional situations again. What would you do differenlty to avoid the triggers? Write down as accurately as possible what you would do to avoid them

For example, the last time your partner blamed you for a bad choice, you immediately became defensive instead of just sharing your feeling of not being understood : in one case you prevent a dicussion from taking place and you create a conflict, in the other case you try to calm down and you crete a safe space where a constructive discussion can take place.

• Fourth step: ‘THE PLAN’

Now is the time to make a plan of action for the next time you are in a situation that involves your emotions in a way that is too intense and may cause you harm or difficulties with others.

Go back to the first three steps, especially the third. I will give you several effective ways to get out of negative emotions when you are experiencing them:

• Avoid anything that could be a trigger

For example, and this is a technique that even comes under the heading of PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) therapy, avoid finding yourself in a situation that has strong similarities with a traumatic situation from the past. Indeed Balgobin, your brain will be in a state of alert as if you were going to relive an important episode: this state of alert will bring you upsetting and negative emotions, even impulsive. Balgobin, even a smell, a color, a geographical location can sometimes unconsciously bring you back to a past shocking situation: hence the capital importance of step 2: find the reasons for your emotions, identify the triggering element.

• Think about the impact your emotions could have on your well-being and that of others

Keeping in mind the pain your emotions can cause will help you control them. In addition, you may face a very emotional person as you are! You know very well that this can lead to an overreaction and an irreversible relationship consequence.

• Distract yourself or isolate yourself from the situation to breathe.

Sometimes the emotional intensity is so great that other strategies can't work. In this case Balgobin, if you don't want to be overwhelmed, it is helpful to distract yourself or physically remove yourself from the situation. You need to take the pressure off and then come back in a more calm and constructive way.

A recurring advice that psychologists give to hyperemotional people is to get alone to deeply introspect.

This is something you should do very often to recharge your batteries. The calm, the silence, the inactivity will allow you to breathe away from the external stimuli. This protective bubble can last a day if you can, a bubble where you slow down, meditate, introspect and do things that make you feel good, outside of any pressure or external constraints. Take time for yourself Balgobin, it is the best gift you can give to your emotions! During this day, let only positive emotions enter you, and try to push away negative emotions with positivity and letting go.

• Try to cultivate positivity as much as possible

Sometimes, people may think that by being optimistic, you’re naive or idealistic. Don’t listen to them, Balgobin, because being an optimist doesn’t mean disconnecting from reality ! If it’s true that you can’t change situations or events, you have a much greater power! That of changing the perception that you have of it. Instead of letting yourself be overwhelmed by negative thoughts, try to make them positive!

For example, if you’re stuck in traffic, rather than complaining that you might be late, try to be positive: this traffic allowed you to avoid the accident that is happening further on the way. If your friend is late, this is the opportunity to make that phone call you had been putting off for days.

→ You see, Balgobin, everything that can be perceived negatively can be transformed by a positive vision that will not change the situation but will modify your state of mind.

Of course, it is not enough to think that you will get a raise for this to happen: life is not that easy. Nevertheless, changing the way you react to what you are going through is the first step towards more happiness !

Imagine that your application for a job has not been selected. The negative vision of this event will be the loss of your confidence, difficulty to find another job, bills to be paid, the look of others… but these ideas do not allow you to bounce back through solutions. This is the trap of pessimism! It leads you into a spiral of bad thoughts. What if this event was the opportunity to do that program or degree you’ve been dreaming of doing for years? Why not tell yourself that there is a better position for you or that another career path would be more fulfilling? The fact is, and I totally understand Balgobin, you know what you loose, but you don’t know what you get. This « what you get » is sometimes so much better! Keep faith in life, for it will give you a brightest future.

→ It is by putting light on the shadows that they dissipate for more clarity.

You can overcome all the obstacles in the world Balgobin, as long as you see it as challenges. Event the most talented athletes, businessmen or stars have to face their fears. These fears are natural, but they shouldn’t stop you from taking action.

« Life has many optimists crazy enough to have overcome the most difficult obstacles and to have succeeded despite everything »

I have given you different ways to deal with, understand, control and minimize your negative emotions Balgobin. I hope you’ll find the best way to work on it. Of course it is a matter of time, but never give up, for the result will be more than what you can expect.

Balgobin, it is possible to live your hypermotionality in a good way. You can find a deep fulfillment even if you feel quiet ‘different’ from others because you are not impervious to emotions. And even if sometimes you don’t have external filters to protect you, it’s important Balgobin that you know how this great emotional capacity has extremely beneficial and powerful corollaries, which bring you rare qualities.

Here are the qualities you can find deep inside of you and use when emotions are too high:

• You are original, creative, delicate and it can represent a major asset in your professional life: you can easily stand out from others and be someone very special in a company that needs to evolve.
• Your sensitivity to the misfortune of others has as a corollary a very powerful empathy: you know how to put yourself in the place of others perfectly. This allows you to be a very important friend because people like to confide in you: you know how to read their hearts!
• You have an acute sense of analysis Balgobin ! You look at every detail of every situation, and you watch the slightest gesture, the slightest eyebrow of every person to draw conclusions ! The emotional state of the person in front of you is no secret : and this is what can lead you to have sincere and lasting relationships because they are based on a deep understanding of things.

To resume, Balgobin, hyperemotivity is not always easy to live with, but it is quite possible to flourish with this excess of emotions. You now know the techniques that will allow you not to let yourself be consumed by these exacerbated emotions, especially in your relationship. Listen to yourself : this is the key to feeling good with yourself and, consequently, with others. Create moments dedicated to your well-being, create a protective bubble in which you will be entirely yourself and where you will let positive emotions reign. Your surrounding must also understand that you need time for yourself away from the emotions of others. I am sure that you will blossom more and more Balgobin, but you must never give up and always keep your goal to evolve as a person.

Balgobin, I will end this report by a quote that I particularly appreciate, and that will allow you not to feel guilty with your emotions :

«Never apologize for the things you feel, it would be like saying: I'm sorry for being me ».